Sunday, September 1, 2013

funky style

Dear funky style,

It's been a funky while
I've been so been so funky
ride the water
the water cold
but I be hotter

Funky style
funky style
don't let your
style
not get buckwild

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Frat Dudes

I saw these frat
dudes
and some
were pretty
fat dudes

but they
gave me free
beer and
snacks to
eat

so they
are cool
in
my cool
book

Sunday, August 25, 2013

breakfast muchies

I wake up
bake up
and


since my homies flake WHAT!?

I eat alone
in the
comfort


of my dome.

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

new boat blues

my friend
got boat
boat be
cool

for wake-
board
shrap
dude

I'd like
see
that
chick

I saw
today
super
naked

but
I
didn't
get
to

been a while crocadiles!

I've been doing
babe hunting
and shit like
that

surfboard
cracked
that shit was
whack

skateboard
tool
got stolen
how gay


I need a
coors light
to make the
day not gay

Monday, July 1, 2013

Surfin' off

Here is this tubular poem I wrote called "surfin off" its about like getting you thing on while riding waves.


Surfin Off


I don't see any other surfers man
time to pull out my willy

oh yeah, pulling out the willy free

I guess its like tugging on it while
your walking or whatever,
but it's still pretty gay
if there are like, a
couple bros around

Saturday, May 18, 2013

look at those gnar scrapes!


I fell while wheelin' my new mountain bike, so here is a new poem dudes!

catch a flow
pedal yo
wear a helmet?
nah that's lame

shit on your parade
doin' wheelies
showin' off
check the method

Oh hhfffuckk! a rock
I hit the rock and
now I wear tubular scars
on my shins and shit

Sunday, March 31, 2013

you dudes like pave
you don't crave shave

you get funky gnarly
no bra rides harly

i get icky sill
when i wiked chill

becuase smokin show
is the way to go

Sunday, January 20, 2013

I can't hang ten with the snowboard...

I can't hang ten with the snowboard...

I went to a local area mountain,
expecting to shred,
but my board kept catching,
and I hit my head.

No hanging ten,
snow doesn't move
but I need to go again
so I can catch a groove

Friday, January 18, 2013

I call this poem

"Stirrin' the Meatloaf"

I get meat,
then loaf it
because who is
going to stop us?

PETA!
is going to shit
in your meatloaf
and you won't notice

because
cows...
are mostly poo anyway
probably

Monday, January 14, 2013

cigs are cool, on occasion

I like cigs after I drink some beers, but you can't get excellent at sports if you do it too much!

you dig cigs?
some times when I party!

but when you get too much
smoke in your lung junk

you do not breathe right

How can you get tasty
on the tube

when you lungs are tight



So i was chillin' out like always, and this rugged homeless bra came up to me and said "I'm gonna piss in the sink"

I was all like "thats not what those are for sir!"


here is my poem about questioning the nature of that...


You, Mr. Pee in the sink
you have flood the urinal

don't go in the sink though,

at least go in the shitter!
why pee in the sink?

Saturday, January 12, 2013

I visited the great white north this weak. I had a few feelings for sure... Canada here is my beef with you....


Why is it cold
and the water still
babes have to many
clothes on

weak

babes are inside
and not
showing off
there rad
junk

Canada

your waves are still
like a gnarly radio station
or like some passed out bro

but, Canada

you do have some wicked
gnar hills
for wicked gnar longboard
which is obviously
pretty cool

Monday, January 7, 2013

I get super naked
in the shower

nice and moist
no desert flower

No more stinky
as of now

surfing waves
takes it out

Sunday, January 6, 2013

Vert Surf

I am gonna change some things up with this post. I hope you dig.


I was getting verticle the other day, and I was wondering why I didn't have someone there to check my style.

Then I realized that a Go-Pro was the way to go, especially so babes can check my gnar steeze at a later date.

I guess I'll just have to upload that stuff later but for now, I'll leave you with this (a letter from California):


Watch me get fakie
Watch me get bakie

-California

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Give me waves or give me death

if someone takes away my waves
then there would be nothing left to krave

if no one stands up for my religion
I will, because my religion is nature

and the nature of my faith
is tasty waves

righteous tubes
and hanging 21

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

New years wave
on new years day

What if you invented
a surfboard
with wheels

so that when you come
out of the wave
you roll on the sand

that would be
so righteous